There are many things I regret, especially within relationships. I think when it comes down to it, you have to swop regret for respect somewhere down the line otherwise, you’ll end up choking on your own fears.

For me, the idea that I haven’t learned from my own mistakes is something that challenges me every day. I’m definitely that person who overthinks about things so much that I’ve already thought about the ending in my head and a million ways of dealing with it so nothing can go wrong.

I don’t know if that’s good that I can think ahead, but it doesn’t help me sometimes when I don’t listen and regrettable moments pop up in my head.

When you’re ever dating someone or even in a friendship, you have to know what you want because if you don’t understand how you should be treated, you’re often moping around looking for the love you think you deserve, and generally that’s not a lot at all.

I think when my very first boyfriend ended up cheating on me in possibly the most public way touching some girl up in the wings of a college performance (I took drama in college), the most bizarre thing happened where I thought, this is how girls must get treated in relationships…

I know! It’s totally stupid but that’s genuinely what my sixteen-year-old self-thought. Switch forward 9 years and I’m still making mistakes but maybe with a few more questions in my head.

For the longest time, and I don’t know whether anyone else is like this but, it’s not really a love lost, it’s more me asking myself why I never left sooner.

A lot of us forget to have respect for ourselves and so we’re left procrastinating and trying to make sense of why we did that AGAIN.

It’s not the one time it happened, its the many times you forget about yourself and put their interests of hurting you before anything else and that’s what you’re mad about.

I also think forgiveness is part of this journey to the self and respecting it. Forgiving yourself is one the most challenging things you can face and I think when you accept that you’ve hurt yourself by letting someone else do it, you’ll be a lot stronger in the future.

Respect is more than a word it’s a being and part of an energy you can give yourself. Good or bad, it’s down to you.


 

 

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